By Beverley Bramwell
Ambitious, bossy, pushy are some of the names I've been called, and others I don’t care to mention.
The unasked question is ‘who do you think you are?’
I’ll tell you who I am. I’m the daughter of immigrant parents, grammar-school educated with an MBA from a London university. There’s nothing remarkable about me, other than I’m a woman of colour who dared to take a seat at the table and who wasn’t afraid. I was raised with the belief that I could be anything I wanted to be. My dad said it might be difficult, but that it shouldn’t stop me going after my dreams.
I’ve carried around the gift of self-belief with me and in difficult times I’m reminded of what my dad said. So, I understand why people couldn’t understand me and questioned why I thought I had the right. However, having self-belief at times made me believe that maybe I was too much. Because after a while the micro criticism begins to wear you down. At the same time, society was indoctrinating us to accept that women were less than. We didn’t deserve equal pay or equal treatment in the workplace. Go home and be a good girl. A nice girl, one who knows her place. We were girls, but they were men. Nice girls don’t speak up, are not ambitious and don’t push themselves forward. They wait to be chosen.
That was 25 years ago. Much has changed, but attitudes towards women less so. Legislation has brought gender discrimination to an end, but the gender balance in companies in 2019 revealed that only 28.6% of women are in executive leadership positions in FTSE 100 companies and this is even less across the FTSE 250. There is no shortage of intelligent, capable women candidates and yet the target of 50% women leaders by 2020 in the UK is unlikely to be met. Female leaders of colour are even less well represented. Many companies are still not ready to see women leaders, even though research supports the evidence that women-led organisations have a better culture and they do not impact the profits negatively.
Women in Business
The existence of the ‘nice girl’ also perpetuates the business culture. Women aren’t pushing themselves forward because they don’t want to be labelled ‘difficult’. I remember a quote from the actress Emma Watson on being known as a feminist: “Apparently I am among the ranks of women whose expressions are seen as too strong, too aggressive, isolating, anti-men and unattractive.” As I said previously it’s being seen as ‘too much’.
Sheryl Sandberg said that women should lean in and for a long time I agreed with her. I don’t anymore, because the gentle approach isn’t working. We talk about ‘disrupting’ business and that Is what I think is required now. If you want to be in the room where it happens, leaning in is not enough. Put your hand up! You want to be seen and heard. You’re here and you’re not going away.
Who do I think I am? Just watch me and you will find out.
Beverley Bramwell is a Success coach. She helps women leaders to boost their impact and influence, so they stand out for leadership and promotion. To find out more about her check her LinkedIn profile and send her a connection request www.linkedin.com/in/beverleybramwell